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Showing posts with label stripper. Show all posts
Showing posts with label stripper. Show all posts

Saturday, June 18, 2011

Give Me Your Cash

All rightee now. Perhaps Jon Huntsman had the right idea when he went about making an innocuous campaign video. (At least, I think it was a campaign video. There are still a few days left and in the latest one that I saw, that little dude was still riding his motocross bike through the desert, so I'm not totally positive.) At least he didn't make a video like the one I'm about to show you. Holy crappings. And let me just tell you that while there are a lot of things out there that people are shouting are racist, almost none of them actually are. But this video? I think it might be just a little racist. And by "a little", I mean I think it totally is.

The video is made by something called Turn Right USA. According to their website, their mission is "...to expose and lampoon the typical politico’s microscopic brain through cutting-edge viral videos with guts and humor!" OK. I'm good with that. I like humor! I like cutting-edge! But that doesn't mean that we see those two things in the same way. In fact, I'm pretty sure that we see them in a totally different manner altogether.

Turn Right USA decided to make an attack ad against a one Janice Hahn. She appears to be a Los Angeles Councilwoman. The ad alleges that she hired "...hard core gang members with taxpayer money to be gang intervention specialists." The ad also alleges that "She even helped them get out of jail so they could rape and kill again." That seems kind of unlikely, but I'm still listening. After those allegations, the ad takes a turn to a place that you just shouldn't go. It shows a scantily clad woman who seems to resemble Ms. Hahn walk up to a stripper pole. That's when the rapping black guys emerge.

That's right. Rapping black guys. They're supposed to be the thugs that allegedly worked with Ms. Hahn. And they rap a catchy a little tune. It goes like this: "Give me your cash, bitch, so we can shoot up the street. Give me your cash, bitch, so we can buy some more heat." And these rapper thug guys with their guns are imposed over the fake Ms. Hahn on the stripper pole who is shaking her buttocks rapidly as the gentlemen place dollar bills in her panties. It's a class act. Watch: (And if it doesn't show, click here.)



Impressive, eh? Am I saying that they shouldn't be allowed to air that piece of s***? Of course not. I'm a big proponent of free speech. But there are some things that are just in poor taste and I think that is one of them. Were all of the thugs that she allegedly let out of prison black men? Or is that just how the ad wants to portray the black men? I don't get it. It's weird. Granted, I would like to know a little bit more about this program that she allegedly instituted by working with gang members and allegedly getting them out of jail. It seems to be something that, if she was involved in it, people should probably know about. But do they need to find out about it by portraying her as an agile cheeked stripper with thug customers. (I really wish that when people portray strippers that are getting a lot of money that they show them with more than a few ones strategically tucked into their outfits. You people can't throw a five spot in there?) It's in poor taste. I'm pretty sure it's at least a little racist. And if she hasn't actually ever been a stripper, I'm pretty sure that it's a little sexist as well. I'm actually at a loss as to what to say about this. It's just wrong, is what it is. Hopefully Turn Right USA will navigate itself into a dead end and this will be the last of this crap that we have to deal with from them.

Monday, May 16, 2011

That Didn't "Just Happen"

I was going to post a video of some guy on the New York City subway vigorously licking his own shoes. Yes. Shoes. Yes. Licking. But I decided against that in favor of a completely different kind of crazy. Let's meet the woman who has had some plastic surgery to enhance her bosom. And by "some plastic surgery" I mean several operations. And by "bosom", I mean...well...I guess I mean her breasts. Oh, did I mention that her breasts are now a 164XXX? They are. Behold!

Good Lord. I didn't even know that you could go that big and I HAVE breasts! Meet Chelsea Charms. If you think that it sounds like a stripper name, of course it does! What do you think that this woman does for a living with those things?! Oh, wait. But she calls herself a "feature dancer". As in "A feature dance in layman's terms is a professional exotic dancer. You've still got agents and things like that." Honey, you can call the pole whatever you'd like. That's not going to change the fact that you're a stripper.
According to The Sun, this woman is 5'2" tall and each one of those suckers (pun probably not intended) weighs 26 pounds! That's fifty two pounds of JUST BREASTS! How she manages to stay upright and not topple over forward is beyond me. She has named these monstrosities Itsy and Bitsy, which I find odd because they're neither one of those things. Naturally, "...she loves the attention her massive chest brings her."

And believe me when I say that this woman has a ridiculous answer for damn near everything. Think her back hurts? She claims it doesn't. Why not? She says it's because "... because she did a series of back exercises to build up her muscles." Ummm...no she didn't. There aren't enough exercises in the world to build up muscles to constantly work all day long at holding up a couple of watermelons. I'm sure that her back constantly hurts...and well it should.

Here's the part that blows me away: She says "I didn't plan on going this big that just happened on its own." Wait. What in the world is she talking about? She HAD the surgery, yes? OK, then. It didn't just HAPPEN ON ITS OWN. I'm pretty sure that she didn't just wake up one day with beach balls growing out of her chest. It happened on it's own?! Please. Does she really expect people to believe that it just HAPPENED?! If 164XXX can "just happen", then I will not be sleeping well at night for quite some time.And I realize that people like big breasts. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. Big breasts, provided that they're cared for, are simply lovely. But hers are not. Not at all. I don't get how that is supposed to be anything but a freak show. I'm willing to hear out other opinions, but I'm truly afraid that there are going to be people out there who do find this attractive. Truly afraid.

Monday, June 7, 2010

What's With The Macaroni And Cheese?

Parents. Well, parent in this case. What is wrong with some of them? Well, what is wrong with this one in this case. There are a number of things wrong with the mom (or supposed to be adult caretaker). These will be pointed out by the narrator of this disturbing clip, a one Tosh.0. (That's pronounced Tosh Point Oh. I don't know why. I don't know what it means. He is wearing a stunning purple sweater vest, however.) But really, the biggest question here is: "What would lead anyone to think that this is OK?" The second most nagging question here would be: "Is pouring dry Kraft Macaroni and Cheese all over yourself supposed to be sexy?" ('Cause it's not!) Yeah, I don't get that part at all. If you do understand the mac n'cheese bit and can explain it to me, please do. But I'm talking about a logical explanation. I don't want an obvious explanation along the lines of "Just look at her!" I am looking at her! And it hurts my eyes!


Tosh.0
Guess What Happens Next - Bad Mom Strips for Kids
http://www.comedycentral.com/
Web Redemption2 Girls, 1 Cup ReactionDemi Moore Picture