He's Not A Kenyan, He's A Socialist

Well, Wednesday was interesting. That was when President Barry released his long form birth certificate because he finally realized that not doing so was causing the entire country to go off the rails. The final straw in the insanity which is the birth certificate issue seemed to have been Donald Trump making a big deal about it. And I find it odd that the emcee of a reality TV show (in which D-List celebrities are compelled to complete some wacky task in hopes of staving off elimination) brought this issue out of the woodwork of the crazy and into the mainstream woodwork of the trying-to-not-act-crazy.

I think I understand how it got to this point, though. I mean, I agreed with President Barry not releasing his long form birth certificate before now because he had already released sufficient proof. And besides that, it made people that continued to question it sound like blathering idiots. What he didn't count on (and what I hoped wouldn't happen) was that people started to actually listen to the blathering idiots and started to convince themselves of that nonsense. The next thing you know, you have the majority of Republicans and a good handful of Democrats believing that President Barry was born in another country. That's not going to do anyone any good.

But do you know what might not do any good either? Releasing the long form birth certificate just as he did. Look, people are going to believe whatever they want to believe with certain things. They're especially prone to being intellectually dishonest if they don't like the guy that is the current President. It happened with Bush (Gore had the most votes and Bush wasn't really President) and it's happening again with President Barry. It happened with Presidents before these guys (I vaguely remember a couple of Clinton conspiracies after Vince Foster offed himself) and it will happen with Presidents after these guys. And no matter what the truth, those who were in the wrong aren't going to admit it.

And I don't even know if Donald Trump really believed the crap that he was spouting to begin with. He said a lot of things before this was re-resolved that he won't cop to now. But that's because he's a crazy carnival barker-esque narcissist. Let's see how he's taking the reality that President Barry was actually born in Hawaii. When surrounded by reporters, one guy managed to get this question off to The Donald: "You said yesterday, "We hear that it is missing." Before that, you said, "You won't believe what my investigators on the ground are saying." Do the people in this country now need to doubt the information that you're being given? Were you making this up? Where did this information come from?"

A reasonable question. Too bad that there wasn't a reasonable answer. "Noooo. I think that what you're going to see...First, we have to look at the certificate. But I am really happy that this has finally taken place because we have some issues that are..are unbelievably important."

Wait. What was that? That's not an answer. Never mind the fact that we DO have issues that are unbelievably important that are not getting the attention that they deserve because of this issue that TRUMP BROUGHT UP HIMSELF! Yeah, try to put that aside for a moment. The reporter realized that it wasn't an answer either when he said, "You didn't answer my question, sir." Trump's response? Guess. Just guess. "I think I did. No. I did. I did answer your question." Oh, for cryin' out loud.

Ummm...no. No, you didn't. See, you weren't so much answering as much as you were just talking. And while there does have to be talking in order to get to the answering, just because there is talking doesn't mean that you're actually doing the answering. No, you just reiterated how freaking proud of yourself you were. And I still don't get that. Here you were, going around saying that you doubted that he was born in this country. Then we get MORE proof (as proof was given a long time ago) that he was born in this country. So, you're proud of the fact that you looked like an ass for doubting it? You're proud that you claimed that the birth certificate was missing? That gives you warm fuzzies inside, Donald? Wow. OK, then. Not even an "I'm sorry. I was wrong." Interesting. You suck. Both as a human being (which I'm only giving him the benefit of the doubt about) and as a jackass.

I haven't seen any recent polling to see if the events that unfolded on Wednesday are going to change anyone's mind. While I am hoping (probably against all hope) that it has snapped some people back into reality, I'm afraid that it hasn't. No, I'm afraid that those who are hardcore are going to look at the newly released birth certificate and have the following questions:

I wish I could say that I thought that this was all done, but I know that it isn't. So, for what won't be the last time, let me reiterate: President Barry wasn't born in Kenya. He's not a Kenyan. He's not a Muslim. He's a freaking socialist! Keep your eye on the ball, people! FOCUS!

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Donald Trump: Birther

As if Donald Trump wasn't whack-a-do enough, he has now come out with a rather birther-like stance about President Barry and his birth certificate. I guess this is getting press because allegedly Donald Trump is thinking about running for president. I don't really think he's going to, but I think he likes to be out there, stroking his own ego, and let others stroke it as well. (Yes, I know what sounds like, so keep your comments to yourselves!) I'm going to get behind what Jon Stewart told Extra TV when Stewart was asked what he would think of it if Trump did run for president. "A gift from God. That is, if he's to continue this, it would be a gift from God. He would be, in fact, gold-plating my living room. I'd be excited to see him do that." And while my living room wouldn't end up gold plated like Mr. Stewart's, I'd still have one heck of a good time with that one as well.

It came to light on 'The View' last week that Mr. Trump was more of a nutjob than I had previously thought. Personally, I can't watch 'The View'. All of those shrews talking at the same time in those shrill voices? And offering opinions based upon absolutely nothing other than their estrogen? No thanks. But I did catch the clip where The Donald said that he had "a little" doubt about whether or not President Barry was born in this country. He said something to the effect of there must be something on his birth certificate that he doesn't want people to see. He also thinks that it is weird that no one remembers him from early in his life. Where to begin?

First of all and for what I wish was the last time, he already has produced a copy of his birth certificate. There was also an announcement in the Honolulu newspaper after his birth. And finally, if there was anyone on the planet who would prove that he was not born in this country and thus ineligible to be president, it would be Hillary Clinton. Do you really think that she didn't have every single resource at her disposal working on this issue when she was campaigning for the Democratic party nomination? She wanted to be president so bad, she would have done just about anything short of murder in order to get it. (And really, I'm not even so sure that was ever off the table.)

But back to The Donald. Now, in an "exclusive" with Newsmax, Donald Trump has "...released his birth certificate" in an effort to...um...well...I don't know what the point of that was. One of the "points" that he makes is where he states "I went to the best college and I was a great student, and it is inconceivable to my brain that no doctor, no nurse, nobody has stepped forward to verify the birth, other than the governor. He remembers? The governor? A birth 50 years ago? Come on. He’s taking a bullet for his party." Oh, for cryin' out loud! Really?

That's the best that he can come up with? First of all, President Barry is 50. It would not be inconceivable for the people who were in the delivery room with him to be dead at this time. After all, his parents (who were a fairly integral part of the process) are dead. And I find it absolutely insane that when the governor says that he remembers the birth of Barack Obama (if that is what Donald Trump is referring to there) that it isn't good enough! That's what Trump wants, isn't it? For someone to come forward and say that they remember? Someone did! But on top of that, you know why it doesn't matter? Because he already HAS produced his birth certificate! What part of that don't those people understand?! (By the way, strangely enough, people have talked about remembering his birth. You can look at this article over at Snopes.com. Feel free to pass it on to Donald Trump if you happen to see him.)

But back to Donald Trump's birth certificate! When President Barry did provide a copy of his birth certificate, it looked like this:

OK. There it is. Also, there was this announcement (49 years ago) that appeared in the newspaper:

That's good enough for me. But Donald Trump, in some sort of weird effort to prove something, releases his birth certificate and it looks like this:

Are you kidding me!? THAT is acceptable to Donald Trump as something that proves someone was born in this country? I could make that on Photoshop in less than ten minutes! I could probably do it in less than five minutes provided that I already had a template and a nice star sticker on hand. Is it filled in with pencil? What the what is that anyway?! I have never seen a birth certificate that looked like that. Are we sure that Donald Trump was born in this country? What's underneath that sticker? What is he trying to hide?!

I find it amusing that this is still an issue with some people. Granted, I find it more annoying than I do amusing, but it's still amusing none the less. I guess that people don't realize how ridiculous they sound when they talk about not believing that President Barry was born in this country. They also don't seem to realize that when you sound like a gigantic fruitcake, it does very little to further your cause. That is, unless your cause is furthering fruitcakes. In that case, you're golden. But in the real world, you're a bit of a doofus, Mr. Trump.

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Some People Are Really Committed To Their Cause

On Thursday, those in the House of Representatives spent roughly two hours reading the US Constitution. What is slightly less remarkable than the document itself is the fact that it has never been done before. I don't know why I find that amazing, I just do. And for some reason that is currently unclear to me, they read a "...from the amended version of the founding document" according to Politicio. I don't know why it was amended. I mean, if you're going to spend at least two hours reading something, you might as well just read the whole thing the way it was written. Then again, not a whole that goes on up there on Capitol Hill makes any sense to me, so I don't know why this would.

Now, you would expect such a reading to be rather uneventful. But thank goodness, it was not! Nope, there was a whack job in the peanut gallery listening to all of this and waiting for just the right moment before making her crackpotness evident to all in attendance. A one 48-year-old (and old enough to know better) Theresa Cao of New York sat and waited until Rep. Frank Pallone (D-N.J.) was reading and Article II, Section 1 came up. Do you want to guess what section that is? Go on. I'll give you a minute. Constitution. Crackpots. Protesting. Not yet? What if I threw President Barry into the mix? Ah-HA! You figured it out, didn't you? The aforementioned jackwagon is a birther. Behold!

Good Lord. She even has a sign. Why am I surprised? Moving right along...Article II, Section 1 of the Constitution is the part which requires "...that only a "natural-born citizen" may be president". Yes. We know. But Theresa Cao seized that opportunity to start shouting, "Except Obama! Except Obama! Help us, Jesus!" Yes. Help us, Jesus, indeed. Help save us from folks like Theresa Cao. And as an officer removed her from the gallery, "...she yelled out "My name is Theresa." Thank you, nutjob. We have made a note. Here's another picture of her, complete with her megaphone. Wow, she's really into this isn't she?

I don't know how many times I have to say this, but I guess it's going to be a few more. President Barry isn't a Muslim and he isn't a Kenyan. He's a freaking socialist! If you're going to protest anything, for the love of God, protest THAT! Help us, Jesus, with that! For cryin' out loud. The video of said disturbance is below. If it doesn't work, clicking on the link to Politico above will take you to it and hopefully it will work there. Enjoy!

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Not Giving Birth, but Having a Cow Instead

What's up with political groups or subsets of politicians being branded with (or promoting themselves as ) some cutesy little name? Has this been occurring for a while and I've just been able to tune it out until now? Or is this new? Whichever it is, the names are lame and the folks behind the names are often lamer. Seriously. Names such as the oft mentioned "Blue Dog Coalition" in the House of Representatives. That group had sort of evolved from the "Boll Weevils Group". Who in the hell names themselves the "Boll Weevils Group"? Aren't boll weevils those little beetle like things with poke-y ends on 'em? That's what you want your group to be associated with? As politicians?! What's up with that? Was Ladybug's Picnic already taken?

But of the groups with the ridiculous names, there's one that I cannot avoid hearing about no matter how hard I try (and believe me, I've TRIED!). Not only that, they have a cause that is just as non-sensible as their name is. Yes, I'm speaking of those nutjobs who have all joined together to form the largest mass of malfunctioning cerebral matter on the planet; those that we call 'The Birthers'.

I realize that it's very easy to get "The Birthers" confused with other names that might sound a lot like it. Like "The Idiots" or "The Morons" or "Too Much Time On Your Hands". It's very easy to misspeak and use one of those terms when the term that you were really looking for was "The Birthers". So if it keeps on happening to you, if you keep on saying "idiots" instead of "Birthers", just keep at it because you MAY actually get it someday. But if you don't, well, at least you're accurate.

The Birthers are not folks who have given birth, as the name might (and DOES) seem to suggest. No, the Birthers are folks who believe that President Barry, President Barack Hussein Obama, is not, repeat NOT a "natural born citizen" of this country, the good ol' US of A, and is thus not eligible to be our President. Um, wait. For reals?

Yep. For reals. According to the Political Hotsheet over there at CBS News, the whole thing started when President Barry was running for President. I'm guessing it was an offshoot movement to the whole "He might be a Muslim" tangent a bunch of softheaded folks became sidetracked with. So in an attempt to quell the fakeroversy that the Birthers had kicked up amongst themselves, Candidate Barry produced his certificate of live birth showing that he was born in Hawaii on August 4, 1961. Behold!

OK, so that's that right? Let's go home. What? That's not good enough? For whom? For whom is it not good enough? Well, for the Birthers, that's who. They say that his "birth certificate" isn't a "birth certificate" at all and that it's faked. The Birthers continue to (incorrectly) assert that he was really born in Kenya and that the document that is purported to be his "birth certificate" is really a faked up document. And that, my friends, is a pretty serious charge for someone to level. You'd think that someone would look into all of this controversy (er, FAKE controversy, ie, fakeroversy) that these Birther people stirred up and finally get to the bottom of this. What's that?

They DID? When? Numerous times, is the answer to that question. And it is not just the Obama Administration that has been claiming that President Barry is a citizen of the United States. Other groups have researched this and came to the same conclusion, that President Barry IS a citizen of the United States. FactCheck.org wrote a very well researched piece on this topic almost a year ago and yet the Birthers are STILL howling that he is not a citizen! It's almost inexplicable why, not just nutjobs are buying into this ridiculous theory, but it's being given steam AND airtime by folks who (previously) had credibility. Not sure where their credibility stands AFTER they've made it seem like there is ANY possibility that President Barry is NOT a citizen. It's really hard to find someone to be credible when they're just blowing crap like that around. Those if I were having to choose one reason as to why this continues to be an issue that sane people are made to listen to, I'd have to side with Donny Deutsch's reasoning as to why so many doubt Obama's citizenship: "Maybe because they're morons." Well said, sir. Well. Said.

Never mind that Honolulu health director Dr. Chiyome Fukino has said that "she personally seen and verified that the Hawaii State Department of Health has Sen. Obama’s original birth certificate on record in accordance with state policies and procedures." Never mind that there was a "birth announcement that had been published in the Honolulu Advertiser on Sunday, Aug. 13, 1961." And never mind that there IS a birth certificate EVEN THOUGH the title of the document is Certificate of Live Birth, IT'S THE SAME THING!

Pretty much, it's the announcement of the birth in the Honolulu Paper that really should have ended this whole thing as soon as that was produced. Because if THAT is faked as well, then what are you Birther people saying? Are you saying that almost 48 years ago, President Barry's mother and father placed a fake ad in the newspaper, announcing the birth of their son Barack, as to have it appear as if he were born in the United States. And they would do this because they just wanted to cover all of their bases just in CASE, SOME DAY far, far into the future, some suspicious sole would be looking for this very information to confirm their theory that the one they called Barry was born a US citizen. Meanwhile, the secret that the prodigal baby would carry with him for the rest of his life would stay hidden and the rest of their plan would slowly fall into place. And then one day it would all be worth it. That day would be the day on which this half white, half black, Kenyan born baby would be elected President of the United States. Just like they'd planned! Bwah-ha-ha-ha-ha-haaaaa!!!!!!!

Honestly, do you people HEAR yourselves when you're spewing this stuff out? And you're able to sleep at night? I don't get it. What's the point? So that you can run around and think that you know something that the rest of us don't? Guess what? We know something that YOU don't! Actually, we know TWO things that you don't! We know that President Barry is a citizen of the United States AND we know that you're freaking crazy. Congratulations, Jerome Corsi! You're the jackass who got this whole ball rolling which, in turn, happened to get you a book deal and numerous TV and radio appearances for you to spew your ridiculousness and promote yourself. Huh. Upon further review, it would seem that you had immense help in getting this to the forefront where it currently tries to creep backward into the forgotten abyss of yesterday's news.

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